Happy New Year, Harmony...not

by Ekek
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Happy New Year, Harmony...not
All Two Scoops for
The week of January 14, 2008
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It's tiresome to watch women try (and fail) to kill Alistair every New Year. What is wrong with the fairer sex in Harmony? Can't anyone shoot straight? Use a gun, girls; apparently you cannot penetrate that thick skull with a knife.


What has the New Year ushered in for Harmony? Nothing happy and nothing good for the loyal viewers, it is another year of same-old, same-old.

Reported by Soap Central as the Déjà vu Cancellation, Passions' contract will not be renewed by DirecTV. Passions will be aired three days a week to stretch the remaining episodes into the summer and then poof - now you see it, now you don't. Shall we blame Tabitha for this?

What else is recycled? How about someone trying to kill Alistair? This time though old Al has turned the tables on his would-be murderer and hired her on as help. Baby-faced Vickie is his new hit-man. I grow weary of the women who try to kill Alistair every New Year and fail. What is wrong with the fairer sex in Harmony? Can't anyone shoot straight? Use a gun, girls. Use a gun. Apparently you cannot penetrate that thick skull with a knife.

Miguel is back and in action (bedroom action that is.) His undying devotion to Kay is still full of judgment and conditions. He loves her, he wants to marry her, but only if she kowtows to his demands - no more magic. Not satisfied with Kay's promises, he wants Tabitha to meet his demands as well. Why, because they live there? Miguel's suggestion that they all work for a living is an excellent one. He should start first and get a place to live and butt his nose out of Tabitha's affairs. Witch or no witch, I'm tired of freeloaders telling her how to live her life in her own home.

The tiresome threesome is at it again. The reunion of Theresa and Ethan that so many fans were so sure of didn't happen yet again. Saw that one coming from a mile away! The New Year rings in with Ethan storming away from Theresa. Surprise! He is still legally married to Gwen and decides to keep it that way. And just as Gwen is planning to reel Ethan back in with romance and candles, Theresa is daydreaming one of her wildest fantasies yet, the utter destruction of Gwen and Rebecca. Yet again both women's dreams are fraught with denial. Gwen seems to forget that Ethan is hooked on Theresa. Romance, marriage or children, the guy can't seem to let her go. Theresa's fantasy is even worse. She thinks she can fly to Mexico, lay a sob story on a Mob Don's murderess widow, and Juanita will send her back to live happily ever after with Ethan. She also conveniently forgets that she is still married to Alistair Crane, the very said-same Alistair Crane who told her she cannot be with Ethan or he'll kill him. Some promises are meant to be kept because Al's new "Vickie the-hit-man" has her first assignment - Ethan Winthrop. This might actually bring a resolution to eight years of annoying triangle. But don't count on it.

Jessica is back with her adorable newborn baby boy. What a cutie-pie that baby is. He stole the scenes from Spike. What is the saying? Never work with babies and animals, you'll be upstaged. I was glad to see Sam back with Ivy too. That man is too hot to be alone. It's a crime against womanhood.

We still had plenty of laughs this week:

Pilar faints dead away at Theresa's latest scheme. "For once in your stubborn self-destructive life, listen to me," she says. Yeah, right Pilar, speeches always work with her.

Ethan's mother calls Theresa names that I cannot even repeat and he still thinks a life with her will work out. Can you just see the family holidays now?

Tabitha decides to zap Miguel into more appropriate attire when he acts like a Neanderthal; caveman fur loin cloths and a big club. Thanks Tabby for the beefcake.

Theresa's fantasy has the penniless Ethan Winthrop outraged and casting the wealthy socialite Gwen (and her mother Rebecca) out of Alistair Crane's house to - get this - go live in a refrigerator box under a bridge. I couldn't help but laugh at this. Not going to happen, Theresa. Not going to happen.

Best of all was the fantasy Mexican Soap scene with Rebecca playing a Charo type character. Cuchi-Cuchi, now that is type casting at its finest. The whole fantasy was hilarious and it seemed that the actors enjoyed it as well. Lindsay Hartley did a great job, way to go girl.

Thanks for checking out Two Scoops,
ekek

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